Just Let Him Cry It Out?

“Don’t go back to him if he cries.  No matter what you do, you must ignore him if he is barking or crying.  You will spoil him.  Don’t reward his crying.  Just let him cry it out.  He will eventually stop.” 

Have you ever heard this advice?  It seems to be pretty popular advice to give someone with a new puppy. 

Trainers may argue that going back to a crying puppy and giving it attention will reinforce the crying.  While there might be some truth in that statement, I don’t think much thought is normally given to the emotional cause of the crying in the first place, nor to the physiological changes that are happening to a puppy’s body and brain while he is crying. 

Yes, a puppy left to cry it out will eventually be quiet, but is that the best thing for the puppy?  Can letting the puppy cry it out lead to problems with anxiety down the road? Is there a better way?

I'd like to propose a different perspective about teaching a puppy to stay by itself.

Let’s talk about getting a new puppy.  Let's think about his first day leaving his mother and littermates, and that safe puppy pen.  Everything he had known up until this day had been comfortable and safe for him.  He was never alone.  He always had the comfort of others around him.  Taking him away from that safety and security is a major life change for him.  He is stressed and looking for his mom and littermates, and the sense of safety he had known.  Very quickly that sense of safety begins to transfer to the person who is caring for him.  

Is it really necessary for a puppy to learn that very first day how to be alone?  When he already feels terribly alone and wants to cling to the new person in his life so he feels safe?

Vinny feeling very safe in his confinement area.  

Staying alone and learning self confidence should be a gradual process.  Puppies who cry are distressed. They don't cry unless they have a reason to cry.  They aren't crying to keep you up at night.  They aren't crying to annoy you or to interrupt your favorite TV show.  They are scared and alone and they feel vulnerable.  They are calling out for someone to care for them and comfort them, and to help them feel safe.

Puppy brains are always learning.  Do we want our puppy's brain to learn and develop from a place of fear or panic (fight or flight), or from a place of trust and safety?  

I hear often about people who let their puppy cry and howl for an hour (or more) until it begins to quiet down.  Each minute that goes by increases that puppy's stress, anxiety and fear.  I have to wonder if letting a puppy cry it out and become more and more upset until it is exhausted may contribute to separation anxiety behaviors later in life?  It is something to ponder. 

I want to teach my puppies to have the capacity to self calm, so they are able to settle down on their own. To a puppy, being left alone must be a scary feeling.  He is unable to take care of himself, and the group of others he’s always been with has helped to keep him safe.  He may feel vulnerable.  He may become hypervigilant, watching everything to see if it is a threat.  

Puppies very quickly form emotional associations with the situations around them. Spending so much time learning that being alone is scary and stressful can't be good for staying by himself later on. These are not feelings we really want our puppy to associate with being left alone at home or with being in a confined space, are they?

It is a process to teach a dog to calm itself.  It is not something you can just throw at him all at once and expect him to get used to and understand that all is well.  Expecting a puppy to just cope with it and get used to it is very stressful for him.  Puppy is calling to you to help him and you don’t come.  Does this build trust in your new relationship?  Puppy doesn’t understand why the rules have suddenly changed. 

Perhaps this is how it's always been done - letting him cry it out.  Or perhaps it worked for a puppy we had a long time ago, so we are sure it is the best way to do it.  Or maybe you know someone with a dog and it worked for them, so you're sure it will work for you and your puppy.  But don't we owe it to our puppies to consider them as individuals?  To do all we can to build their trust and their confidence that we understand what they're communicating to us?  Sometimes we do need to think outside of our box ... 

Holiday Photos? Make These Adorable Collars!

Now begins the season of taking holiday photos.  Some will take dogs (and cats!) to see Santa for pictures. Some will pose the family animals with the family humans of all ages and capture memories forever more.

Tulle collar.

These adorable collars are not hard to make, and you can be creative in your use of materials and colors to match your dog's personality and the occasion.  

Cut elastic into strips that will easily fit around your dog's neck without stretching.  Without stretching the elastic, the collar should fit close to your dog's neck but not tight.  Add an inch to that length and cut the strip that length.  The extra inch is to allow for you to tie the ends together easily to create a circle.  Cut off any loose ends after you tie it.  

Tulle cut into strips can make a fluffy, tutu-type collar.  How long you cut the strips will determine how fluffy the collar will be.  You can fold the tulle strip in half and hold it on the elastic collar to see how far it will stick out.  Adjust your tulle strips accordingly.

There are a couple ways to attach the tulle.  One is to simply tie the tulle to the elastic with knots.  I prefer to use slip knots.  To make a slip knot, fold each strip in half.  You will then have a folded end and two loose pieces at the other end.  The two loose ends go underneath the elastic collar strip and curl around the elastic, so you now have the elastic in the middle.  Then slip the two loose ends into the hole created by the folded end and pull the loose ends through until it tightens on the elastic.  (See photo below)  Don't pull too hard.  Just hard enough to have it tied around the elastic. Continue in this way until the entire collar has been filled.

Shown with ribbon because it's easier to see.

Ribbon collars are also pretty.  Choose several colors/styles of ribbon that you feel complement each other. Attach them in the same way as attaching the tulle above.  It's nice when you cut the ribbon strips to cut the ends of each strip at an angle.  It looks fancier and prevents a lot of unraveling.

Voila!  Super cute and easy collars!

Ribbon collar.

Making and Using a Solid Leash

A solid leash can be helpful with a smaller blind deaf dog.  It allows you to have a way to give subtle leash cues at your dog's neck level, which are clearer to the dog than if they come from far above her.  It also will save your back from needing to bend over to give those cues or lead your dog around obstacles on a walk. Think of it as an extension of your arm to allow you to reach down lower.  

A solid leash can be useful during walks on busy sidewalks or in areas that you will need to steer your dog around obstacles or people, or when teaching certain training exercises when you want your dog to stay right next to your leg.  A solid leash will not be very useful on walks when you want to let your dog sniff around and explore.  A regular or long leash would work better for that.  

It will take some practice for you to learn how to handle the solid leash fluently.  There is less slack than with a regular leash, so your cues travel directly to your dog's neck.  You will need to use much less leash pressure - sometimes just a small adjustment of your hand or wrist will give a different cue to your dog. 

You can use a very simple and inexpensive version of a solid leash, or you can create a very elaborate one. The solid leash I use is a curtain rod that was the right length for me to hold easily in my hand and also reached down to my dog's neck level.  Getting one that is too long will be cumbersome to hold. Getting one that is too short will require bending over to hold it.

The curtain rod has a finished surface and has comfortable end caps on it.  It has a more finished look and feel than a wooden dowel rod, which would have worked just as well.  I cut up an old leash with a small clip that wouldn't be too heavy or clunky for my dog's neck.  I left a small tab of leash connected to the clip. This allows for a bit of flexibility between my dog and the rod.  I then used heavy tape to attach the tab of leash to the end of the curtain rod.  Voila!  This version works so well for us that we haven't seen a need to change it.

Notice there is a bit of leash between the rod and the clip

This leash is meant as a guide to help cue your dog around obstacles and people.  Please don't use it to pull or push your dog.  Take the time to teach your dog the cues and you will be amazed how easy it is to convey information to your dog through a gentle touch on the solid leash.  

You can use the same techniques for teaching regular leash walking to teach solid leash walking.  If your dog already knows gentle collar cues, it should be easy to review the steps with the solid leash.  But don't assume that the cues coming from the solid leash will feel the same to the dog as what she already knows.  Take some time to review and keep it a positive experience for both you and your dog.  

If you would like some help with the steps of teaching leash walking to a blind and deaf dog, here is a great article to help you:  Click here to go to the article.   The same steps in the article can be used to introduce the solid leash to your dog.  

The solid leash is not a tool that I use every day, but I have found it very helpful with Treasure, who is a small dog, in certain situations and for teaching certain behaviors.  I hope if you have a smaller dog, that you may find it helpful as well.  

Vinny's Trick Show

Wow!  Look who is joining the ranks of Novice Trick Dog!  Vinny earned his title certificate and ribbon!

Vinny 6 months old

This guy is just SO much fun to play with!  He learns just as fast as I can teach him and is always ready for more.  Enjoy Vinny's new tricks:

How Did You Get That Picture?

I'm often asked how I get such great pictures of my dogs, especially when I am taking a picture of all of them together in a group shot, like this one: 

There are a couple secrets I'll share with you.  

The first is that I teach a solid stay behavior to all of my dogs. I want them to be able to stay in any comfortable position when asked for as long as I need them to stay there.  It becomes my responsibility to be sure that I'm not asking my dogs to stay in a position or situation that is uncomfortable or unsafe for them.  

In the above picture, I know that the dogs that are up on top of the bales are comfortable with being on various surfaces and being up off the ground.  I also know they have great stays and are very unlikely to move.  This means I feel safe leaving them up on top of the bales while I move away to take pictures. 

The dog in the lower left is Vinny.  He is still a puppy and does not have a very solid stay yet.  When I took this picture, we had never worked on a stay in a brand new public place before, and he had never done a stay with me so far away from him or for so long.  Plus he was excited to be out with the other dogs and wanted to bounce around and play.  His leash is attached in case I needed to catch him quickly, but I tucked it behind him so it wouldn't show in the picture.  He did great because I took many breaks and went back to reward him for choosing to stay.  This made the photo shoot take longer, but left me and my dogs happier and helped Vinny be successful.

The dog in the lower right is Vegas.  He can't see very far away from him and he is deaf, so when I backed up to take the photo, he couldn't see me.  That meant he had no idea where I had gone.  I know that Vegas can get spooked and if I am not within his line of sight, he will bolt and run far and fast until I can catch up with him.  Vegas has a leash on and is tethered to the hay bale just in case.  He has a great stay, but I will not take a chance with my dogs' safety.  If you look closely, you can see his leash tethered, but it does not detract from the great picture.  

My second secret is to take a LOT of pictures!  I take way more pictures than I will need so that I'm able to go back and choose the best shots.  For this great picture, there were many others that I deleted with dogs looking this way or that way.  It is hard to get blind and deaf dogs to look at the camera on demand.  By taking lots of pictures from different angles, I then have lots of great pictures to choose from and can usually find one where they are looking in my direction at leash partially.  

I already alluded to the fact that I carry treats - I carry lots of toys and treats during my photo shoots.  I don't want my dogs to look bored in their pictures.  It has to be fun for them for me to get the great shots that I get.  The photos are for my enjoyment, so I do all I can to make the process for my dogs' enjoyment also.  I schedule plenty of time and take lots of breaks.  I know which of my dogs enjoy photo sessions and which ones get tired of them quickly.  I can choose which dog I photograph first and whether to do the group shot first thing or perhaps in the middle before certain dogs get tired.  

These are just a few of my favorites from out last photo session:  

Owen - paws up stay

Brinks - sit stay and wave paw

Treasure - sit stay

Vinny - sit stay with his own variation of sniffing the air for treats

Vegas - sit stay and his famous smile

Announcing!

The White Dog Blog now has its own book!

I started the White Dog Blog 6 years ago as a way to educate the public about a tragedy.  Puppies are being born blind, deaf, or even both, due to a completely preventable genetic combination of merle to merle.  I hope through my efforts to educate, that one day, this type of merle to merle breeding will no longer be supported by the dog community.  In the meantime, this offers a tremendous resource for those who are rescuing, adopting and training these special dogs. 

Through my educating, I have many people contact me looking for specific topics in my blog.  There are many posts, and all posts about one topic are not grouped together, making them sometimes tricky to find.  Through the graces of technology, I have ways of tracking the most popular and commented on posts, and I have grouped them all together for you, by topic, in this great new book!  

All the most popular and influential posts are together in one place making them easy to find and refer back to again and again!

The book is available in paperback and kindle formats.  The link is here.   Take a look!  

Do Dog Trainers Get Frustrated?

Lately, this cute adorable little fuzzy white puppy has been frustrating me!  I know, just look how adorable he is, right?  Yes, this was the adorable-ness that came into my life several months ago.  

And, puppy-hood is a lot of work for us humans!  Housetraining, puppy proofing the house, sleepless nights, constant supervision, not to mention socialization and starting to teach good manners, and on and on ... Truthfully, it can be exhausting - yes, even for us professional dog trainers!  

But when the puppies are so tiny and cute, it is easy to be motivated to keep going.  They also still sleep a lot at this stage, which provides short windows in which we can get things done or nap ourselves.  

At some point, our brilliant little puppies become quite charming and relatively well-behaved and we think we've done an excellent job raising them.  We might even pat ourselves on the back a bit.  Or breathe a sigh of relief.  

Now enter adolescence ... 

Oh, still adorable, right?  Yes he is.  And he still reminds me to laugh quite a bit out of each day.  But I am also shaking my head at times in frustration.  This is a tough stage to get through sometimes - that teenage stage.  Puppies get BUSY!!  Even busier than they were before!  And they hardly ever sleep anymore - what happened to all the naps?  Large breed puppies are getting close to their adult size, but they are still far from adulthood.  They are just huge puppies!  

So many people give up on their puppies at around 6 months of age.  I see this a lot in the shelter and rescue world.  It is a tough time.  It's pretty normal (even for us dog trainers!) to be frustrated.  Puppies are rowdy and seem to come up with behaviors overnight that you thought were either non-existent or were no longer an issue.  

Oh, 6 month old puppies are still endearing and cuddly and playful and smart.  They are learning so very fast that it's hard to keep up with them - and it's either stuff we want them to learn, or stuff that we don't.  

Vinny's challenging behaviors right now?  Well, when I'm out of the room, he pulls up the bathroom rug and shakes it until it's dead, then dragging it to the middle of the bedroom floor to display his kill for all to see.  He is back to mouthing hands and arms with a passion, and is back to being overstimulated by touch, grooming and handling.  He is actively teething right now so his chewing behaviors have increased a lot - but for the most part he limits this to toys and bones. Although he has a strange attraction to chewing on my computer chair!  He is trying to jump up on me and others when he had been sweetly sitting.  He discovered he likes rolls of toilet paper.  And as the weather is getting cooler, he has discovered my jacket that hangs just right so he can grab it in his mouth as we walk along.  

Now, most days, I am able to laugh to myself at his antics - I mean, after all, he is only a teenager once, right?  As a dog trainer, I know that this phase will pass and he will settle into a calmer, more reliable adult.  I know that the most important thing for me to do right now is to manage Vinny's environment and to set him up for success whenever I can.  I know to maintain consistency and gentleness in my relating to him, and to not allow frustration to take hold.  

But it is truly a full-time job to keep him entertained appropriately, to give him things to do to keep his mind and body busy, and to keep my patience and sense of humor.   There are times when I do get frustrated.  So, what do I do when frustration begins to creep in?

Take a break!  Too much togetherness can increase frustration.  It becomes a never-ending cycle of overstimulated puppy and frustrated person.  Put puppy in a puppy-safe area with every toy and bone you can find, including food puzzle toys that are safe to leave with him unsupervised.  Frozen stuffed Kongs and hollow bones are great for teething puppies and can keep them busy for quite a while.   After a break, you will both be in a better frame of mind and will be ready to play and have some fun!